Today, I get to introduce to you the newest character in the ensemble cast of the Slightly Neurotic Hitwoman series by JB Lynn: Piss the cat.
This is an excerpt from THE HITWOMAN AND THE FAMILY JEWELS. It takes place in the office of a veterinarian where the neurotic hitwoman, Maggie Lee, waiting for news about the well-being of her beloved dog, is sitting with a one-eyed, scarred cat.
Doctor Felton strolled into the reception. He came to an abrupt stop, a look of shock on his face.
The cat’s comforting purring stopped.
Fear lanced my heart and I trembled. “What is it?”
“You’ve got piss on your lap!” he exclaimed.
Certain I’d misheard him, I asked, “What?”
“Piss,” the doctor insisted. “Piss is on your lap.”
“He means me,” the cat explained.
I looked down at her, then back at the vet. “You mean the cat?”
He nodded. “We call her Miss Piss because she peed in the spare set of shoes I keep in the back.”
“That’s a horrible name.” I looked down at the cat. “Tell me what your name is.”
“It’s a cat,” Patrick reminded me. “It can’t talk.”
The cat had the audacity to wink at me, at least that’s what I think she did with her one good eye, before jumping off my lap and stalking away. “I’m going to relieve myself in his shoes,” she purred naughtily.
About the Author:
Besides being a writer, JB Lynn is a compulsive reader, a runner (of sorts), an enthusiastic cook (who doesn't get the appeal of the Food Network), and someone who has an irresistible urge to eavesdrop at all times.
JB has a great love of her husband, dogs, coffee, purple ink, spiral notebooks, running gear, hot showers, and '80s music. Given enough time, all of these things will eventually show up in her books.
You can read my review of The Hitwoman and the Family Jewels, plus there's links to my reviews of the entire series. JB's been a frequent guest on Girl Who Reads and you can read all her appearances by clicking on the J. B.Lynn label. But really all you need to know is: The series is HILARIOUS, a quick read that's perfect for summer holiday reading.
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Girl Who Reads is an Amazon advertising affiliate; a small fee is earned when purchases are made through the above link. A free ebook was provide by the author for review. The giveaway is sponsored by the author who is responsible for fulfillment. The giveaway is also part of the GWR Publicity promotional event paid for by the author. No compensation was provided for this post.