Beneath the Dune by Walter Ramsay
paperback, 234 pages
Published: June 2011 by Pena Beach Press
ISBN13: 9780983440703
Source: Author
Read: November 2012
Goodreads, Amazon, IndieBound
Beneath the Dune rounded out my "battle of the thrillers". You might recall a few weeks ago I somehow found myself reading 3 thrillers at one time. I typically try to space out books of the same genre so I don't end up comparing them to one another. I guess I was just starved for an adrenaline rush.
Perhaps, if I had read Beneath the Dune by itself instead of so closely with other thrillers I would have given it higher marks. It had potential to be a great paranormal murder mystery. At one point, I did get a little creeped out. Yet, for the long haul it kind of fell flat for me.
While it could have been a cool literary device to switch to third person during the dream sequence, I found it jarring to go back and forth between third and first person. I might have liked it better if only the dream had been in third person to give it a more out of body feel, but even after Tucker woke up the story would stay in third person to the end of the chapter and I didn't like that.
Have you read my blog long? Know how I feel about sex scenes, particularly unnecessary/doesn't fit the story sex scenes? Yeah, Beneath the Dune had one of those. I was like, do you want to be a paranormal murder mystery or a steamy romance novel? I almost put the book down because it was so unneeded (at least in the level of detail).
I wanted to like this book and really thought it could have been a great book. However, it pushed too many of my literary pet peeves for me to thoroughly enjoy it.
Girl
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December 8, 2012
December 7, 2012
Friday Fun with Terri Morgan
Terri Morgan joins us today with an interview with Ayla "Ava" Swarthout/Caitlin Kane, the fictional author of the memoir Playing the Genetic Lottery.
TM: Your story of growing up with two schizophrenic parents is a very personal tale of an unconventional childhood. Many people are ashamed to admit there is anyone in their family who is mentally ill. Why did you decide to tell your story?
Caitlin: I did for a couple of reason. First off, I was trying to come to terms with my life, and writing about it was a great way for me to do that. Obviously, my childhood was pretty traumatic. Even without the house fire and the car crash, there was a lot of drama and dysfunction in my childhood. As a mother raising two children of my own, I wanted to process my life so I could put a lot of the baggage behind me and become the best mother possible.
Caitlin: I did for a couple of reason. First off, I was trying to come to terms with my life, and writing about it was a great way for me to do that. Obviously, my childhood was pretty traumatic. Even without the house fire and the car crash, there was a lot of drama and dysfunction in my childhood. As a mother raising two children of my own, I wanted to process my life so I could put a lot of the baggage behind me and become the best mother possible.
Secondly, I think it's time for mental illness to come out of the closet, so to speak. My parents didn't ask for the disease. They didn't want to get sick, and it's not fair that they are. Life is a struggle for them. Despite their illnesses and challenges, they're my parents and I love them. It makes me angry when I see people ignore them, or worse, make fun of them. I wanted people to know that mentally ill people deserve to be respected, like anyone else.
TM: Speaking of angry, you were an angry kid.
Caitlin: You're darn right I was. Moving constantly, always switching schools, having parents who acted weirdly, being afraid to make friends because they might want to come to my house. Not to mention the turmoil of never knowing what kind of mood my folks would be in. You'd be angry, too.
TM: How did you stop being so angry?
Caitlin: It must have been those 'damn right I'm pissed' classes I was sentenced to in middle school. Just kidding. I stopped being so angry when I learned more about schizophrenia and that my parents behaved the way they did because they are ill through no fault of their own. I have a lot of good people in my life, like my grandparents, aunt, uncles, cousins, and my husband Jason of course. They've all helped me to appreciate the good things in life. My extended family also showed me, through their examples, how to cope with the impacts of having relatives who are mentally ill. Sure, my grandparents wished our family hadn't been touched by mental illness. But they accepted it, and it didn't change how much they loved my parents. It also helped that I had a couple of insightful counselors who helped me recognize the roots of my anger and understand what was really upsetting me.
TM: You've come a long way since your childhood and learned a lot about schizophrenia, which as you point out, tends to run in families. Even though you know that the chances of developing the disease yourself is very slim because you're in your 30s, you are still afraid. Why?
Caitlin: I think there are just some fears you can't recover from, or at least I can't. From my support group I've learned that a lot of other people who have schizophrenic parents share my fear. I think it's because children learn so much about the world and how to behave from their parents. When one or both of your parents is mentally ill, that's what you see at home. Even though I know that I'm past the age when schizophrenia tends to develop, it's a fear I just can't shake. Especially since I have children. I would hate for them to have to grow up with a schizophrenic mother. And I'm worried, since the disease has a hereditary component, that one or both of my kids may end up with it. That worry, I think, helps reinforce my own fears about getting sick myself.
TM: Do you have any advice for people in similar situations?
Caitlin: Read my book! And take advantage of the help that is out there, like organizations like the National Alliance on Mentally Illness, which is also known as NAMI. There are local NAMI chapters all across the country. People can find one near them, and learn a lot about the resources available for families by going to www.nami.org. Learn as much as you can about mental illness, because knowledge is power. Participate in support groups. Just knowing there were others going through similar experiences was a great comfort to me. Their stories helped to validate my experiences and let me know I wasn't alone.
About the Author:
Find Playing the Genetic Lottery at Goodreads, Amazon, and IndieBound.Terri Morgan is a book junkie and freelance writer from Soquel, California. She reads at least 3 books a week, and gets nervous if she doesn't have new reading material available. When not reading, she is often found writing. Over the past three decades, her work has appeared in hundreds of different magazines, newspapers, newsletters and on websites. The author of 4 non-fiction books for young adults, and the co-author of four additional non-fiction volumes, Terri released her first novel, Playing the Genetic Lottery, as an e-book in late 2011. Now, Playing the Genetic Lottery is also available in paperback. From Goodreads.com
The views, beliefs, and opinions expressed by guest post authors are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, beliefs, or opinions of Girl Who Reads. Girl Who Reads is an advertising affiliate with Amazon and IndieBound; a small fee is earned when purchases are made using the above links.
Related articles
- Cover Showcase: Playing the Genetic Lottery - Terri Morgan (theindieexchange.com)
- Creativity, A Silver Lining to Mental Illness (urbantimes.co)
- Schizophrenia Myths and Facts (everydayhealth.com)
December 6, 2012
Tips on Thursday: Photobucket
In April, I wrote a tips post about the importance of photos and graphics in blog post to attract readers. Not only can they be eye catching, but graphics can aid in branding and recognition. During Bloggiesta this year, I created graphics for my features.
I am not some Photoshop genius, though I have taken a basic seminar at work. It's been years and I haven't had much use for it since I took the class. Also, Photoshop is expensive so it's not a program that I have on my home computer. There is GIMP, which is open source and works similarly to Photoshop. But, again, I'm not all that graphics savvy.
I did create my feature graphics and I'm pretty proud of myself. I've had others ask about simple graphic tips and tools, so I thought I would share my secret with you.
Earlier this year, Photbucket.com updated their editing tools. I love it! It is so simple to use their basic editing and it has provided me with everything I needed that I haven't even tried their advance editing. I did take a look at it and it looks similar to Photoshop and GIMP.
The first step is to find an image you want to use. For my features, I found photos in the free download section of Dreamstime.com. For the slideshow on the home page I usually use the book cover.
Next, I decide if I want to use the whole image, part of the image or want to make a background for it. For my features, I just uploaded the image straight to Photobucket. For my slide show, I usually choose a background "box" for it. I have several "boxes" uploaded to Photobucket. They are various colored rectangle images.
In the basic edit screen on Photobucket you will see the tools you have available:
There's a ton of things you can do to an image to spiffy it up. If you aren't too confident in your graphic artist skills, don't worry. It is really easy to resize, crop, make a photo look old, add text and borders, etc. When I use my background "boxes" I often add an overlay so that the background is not just plain and flat - I'm particularly fond of the retro poster overlay. With the options you have in Photobucket, you can make your graphics unique and professional looking.
I know this sounds like a advertisement, but I've been so pleased with what I've been able to accomplish with Photobucket. I love making graphics now.
There are a few limitations with the basic editor, but if you are looking for an easy to use, free photo editing software then Photobucket is great. If you have used their advance editor, I would love to hear your thoughts on it.
I am not some Photoshop genius, though I have taken a basic seminar at work. It's been years and I haven't had much use for it since I took the class. Also, Photoshop is expensive so it's not a program that I have on my home computer. There is GIMP, which is open source and works similarly to Photoshop. But, again, I'm not all that graphics savvy.
I did create my feature graphics and I'm pretty proud of myself. I've had others ask about simple graphic tips and tools, so I thought I would share my secret with you.
Earlier this year, Photbucket.com updated their editing tools. I love it! It is so simple to use their basic editing and it has provided me with everything I needed that I haven't even tried their advance editing. I did take a look at it and it looks similar to Photoshop and GIMP.
The first step is to find an image you want to use. For my features, I found photos in the free download section of Dreamstime.com. For the slideshow on the home page I usually use the book cover.
Next, I decide if I want to use the whole image, part of the image or want to make a background for it. For my features, I just uploaded the image straight to Photobucket. For my slide show, I usually choose a background "box" for it. I have several "boxes" uploaded to Photobucket. They are various colored rectangle images.
In the basic edit screen on Photobucket you will see the tools you have available:
There's a ton of things you can do to an image to spiffy it up. If you aren't too confident in your graphic artist skills, don't worry. It is really easy to resize, crop, make a photo look old, add text and borders, etc. When I use my background "boxes" I often add an overlay so that the background is not just plain and flat - I'm particularly fond of the retro poster overlay. With the options you have in Photobucket, you can make your graphics unique and professional looking.
I know this sounds like a advertisement, but I've been so pleased with what I've been able to accomplish with Photobucket. I love making graphics now.
There are a few limitations with the basic editor, but if you are looking for an easy to use, free photo editing software then Photobucket is great. If you have used their advance editor, I would love to hear your thoughts on it.
Related articles
- All About Photo Editing Programs (answers.com)
- Turn Your Photos Into Stories- Photobucket Stories (babyrabies.com)
December 5, 2012
Featured Book: Utterly Loved by Kat Bastion
#1 Amazon Love Poem Best Seller Utterly Loved with Foreword by New York Times & USA Today Best Selling Author Sylvain Reynard is a book of love poems and inspirational quotes.
In Utterly Loved, award-winning paranormal romance writer Kat Bastion shares her poetry with the world for charity. Heartfelt poems, rich in passion and rooted in nature, transport us to misty forests and sandy beaches.
What began as a private collection of poetic love letters to her husband for their twentieth anniversary, evolved into a book of poems and quotes they decided to share with the world.
All proceeds of Utterly Loved, after costs and taxes, will go directly to selected charities. So far, those charities include World Vision and Covenant House.
The purpose of Utterly Loved is simple.
To share love with those who read it…
To inspire those to feel it…
To help those who desperately need it.
Standing together around the world we each can do a small part to have a big impact. United we can help those who desperately need it to feel... Utterly Loved.
About the charities:
World Vision is a Christian humanitarian organization dedicated to working with children, families, and their communities worldwide to reach their full potential by tackling the causes of poverty and injustice. Working in nearly 100 countries around the world, World Vision serves all people, regardless of religion, race, ethnicity, or gender.
Covenant House was founded in 1972 with the simple, profound mission to help homeless kids escape the streets. Today they are the largest privately funded charity in the Americas providing loving care and vital services to homeless, abandoned, abused, trafficked, and exploited youth.
Buy the Book
About the Author:
Website: www.KatBastion.com
Blog: www.talktotheshoe.com
Twitter: @KatBastion
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-Bastion/382546338470769
Giveaway:
Kat has a special gift for one of my readers - 1 signed paperback copy of Utterly Loved (open internationally).
a Rafflecopter giveaway
In Utterly Loved, award-winning paranormal romance writer Kat Bastion shares her poetry with the world for charity. Heartfelt poems, rich in passion and rooted in nature, transport us to misty forests and sandy beaches.
What began as a private collection of poetic love letters to her husband for their twentieth anniversary, evolved into a book of poems and quotes they decided to share with the world.
All proceeds of Utterly Loved, after costs and taxes, will go directly to selected charities. So far, those charities include World Vision and Covenant House.
The purpose of Utterly Loved is simple.
To share love with those who read it…
To inspire those to feel it…
To help those who desperately need it.
Standing together around the world we each can do a small part to have a big impact. United we can help those who desperately need it to feel... Utterly Loved.
About the charities:
World Vision is a Christian humanitarian organization dedicated to working with children, families, and their communities worldwide to reach their full potential by tackling the causes of poverty and injustice. Working in nearly 100 countries around the world, World Vision serves all people, regardless of religion, race, ethnicity, or gender.
Covenant House was founded in 1972 with the simple, profound mission to help homeless kids escape the streets. Today they are the largest privately funded charity in the Americas providing loving care and vital services to homeless, abandoned, abused, trafficked, and exploited youth.
Buy the Book
About the Author:
Kat Bastion is a multi-award winning paranormal romance writer, poetic warrior, and eternal optimist who loves getting lost in the beauty of nature.
Website: www.KatBastion.com
Blog: www.talktotheshoe.com
Twitter: @KatBastion
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/pages/Kat-Bastion/382546338470769
Giveaway:
Kat has a special gift for one of my readers - 1 signed paperback copy of Utterly Loved (open internationally).
a Rafflecopter giveaway
Related articles
- Utterly Loved Foreword Author Reveal... (bookishtemptations.com)
- Utterly Loved ~ Cover Reveal & Sharing Abundance (bookishtemptations.com)
- Kat Bastion: Embracing Sensuality... (bookishtemptations.com)
- Send a Meaningful Gift from World Vision for Giving Tuesday! (GIVEAWAY) (susanheim.blogspot.com)
Anne Trager: Voice in Translation (guest post)
I set out to write this guest post about literary translation, and the first thing that came to mind was voice. There’s a lot of talk about a writer’s voice. So what happens to that voice when a work is translated into another language?
I recently gave a talk about my whole experience founding Le French Book, a digital-first publishing venture that translates great reads from France into English. We have a bit of experience translating. I took excerpts from three of our titles all translated by the same person (me, myself and I) and read them to the audience. I wanted to know if they heard the different voices. The funny thing is, even though I had translated all three, I actually didn’t recognize any of them, and well, they all were very different. The translation somehow conveyed each author’s voice.
World acclaimed translator Julie Rose, who did an outstanding modern version of the French classic Les Miserables says, “Translation is an art of listening, which means getting into ‘character’ and staying there, convincingly, from start to finish. The ‘successful’ translation is the one where I, the translator, am completely invisible.”
I wouldn’t want you to get the impression that all translators are schizophrenic with abnormally absent egos. There is a lot more to literary translation than just reproducing a writer’s voice in another language. You have to find equivalencies, to ponder what certain cultural references really convey, and whether the readers in another language will actually get it.
With each book, I’ll spend some time pondering what of the Frenchness to lose in translation. Some of it I don’t have a choice about. Take our recent release, a whodunit set in wine country Treachery in Bordeaux. It is a classic whodunit set in wine country, and I learned the full diversity of wine-related vocabulary in French. It is somewhat more limited in English. So there I had barrique, tonneau, fût and futaille all used very
regularly (sometimes in the same paragraph), all referring to what in English we commonly call barrel. That is a detail that ultimately doesn’t impact the final story, but is a fun translator’s challenge. There were a lot of them in that book: some local rhyming songs and ditties, a very colorful character with very colorful vocabulary, and lots of information about winemaking.
In two of our other releases—the legal procedural The Paris Lawyer and the police procedural The 7th Woman—there were challenges related to the stories revolving around different judicial and police systems. How can you get a reader to understand what is going on in a courtroom with three judges instead of one without losing them?
Our goal with Le French Book is to publish entertaining books, and so the translator’s goal is to make sure the read in English gives the same shivers of expectation, longing to read more and pangs of emotions. You have to make sure nothing takes the reader out of the story or undermines suspension of disbelief.
Of course, readers will not necessarily know how close the final result is to the source, so I would add that ultimately, for readers, what counts is that the end result is a good read. Isn’t that the whole point, no matter what language the story is told in originally?
I recently gave a talk about my whole experience founding Le French Book, a digital-first publishing venture that translates great reads from France into English. We have a bit of experience translating. I took excerpts from three of our titles all translated by the same person (me, myself and I) and read them to the audience. I wanted to know if they heard the different voices. The funny thing is, even though I had translated all three, I actually didn’t recognize any of them, and well, they all were very different. The translation somehow conveyed each author’s voice.
World acclaimed translator Julie Rose, who did an outstanding modern version of the French classic Les Miserables says, “Translation is an art of listening, which means getting into ‘character’ and staying there, convincingly, from start to finish. The ‘successful’ translation is the one where I, the translator, am completely invisible.”
I wouldn’t want you to get the impression that all translators are schizophrenic with abnormally absent egos. There is a lot more to literary translation than just reproducing a writer’s voice in another language. You have to find equivalencies, to ponder what certain cultural references really convey, and whether the readers in another language will actually get it.
With each book, I’ll spend some time pondering what of the Frenchness to lose in translation. Some of it I don’t have a choice about. Take our recent release, a whodunit set in wine country Treachery in Bordeaux. It is a classic whodunit set in wine country, and I learned the full diversity of wine-related vocabulary in French. It is somewhat more limited in English. So there I had barrique, tonneau, fût and futaille all used very
regularly (sometimes in the same paragraph), all referring to what in English we commonly call barrel. That is a detail that ultimately doesn’t impact the final story, but is a fun translator’s challenge. There were a lot of them in that book: some local rhyming songs and ditties, a very colorful character with very colorful vocabulary, and lots of information about winemaking.
In two of our other releases—the legal procedural The Paris Lawyer and the police procedural The 7th Woman—there were challenges related to the stories revolving around different judicial and police systems. How can you get a reader to understand what is going on in a courtroom with three judges instead of one without losing them?
Our goal with Le French Book is to publish entertaining books, and so the translator’s goal is to make sure the read in English gives the same shivers of expectation, longing to read more and pangs of emotions. You have to make sure nothing takes the reader out of the story or undermines suspension of disbelief.
Of course, readers will not necessarily know how close the final result is to the source, so I would add that ultimately, for readers, what counts is that the end result is a good read. Isn’t that the whole point, no matter what language the story is told in originally?
Anne Trager founded Le French Book to bring France's best crime fiction, thrillers, novels, short stories, and non-fiction to new readers across the English-speaking world. The company’s motto is: “If we love it, we’ll translate it.”
Follow us on Twitter @lefrenchbook
Like us on Facebook http://www.facebook. com/lefrenchbook
Sign up to receive our latest news and deals: http://eepurl.com/j5K79
December 4, 2012
Excerpt: The Last Supper Catering Company
The Last Supper Catering Company is the heartwarming storyof B. Thankful Childe-Lucknow. Turned out with red corkscrew hair, one eyebrown, the other green, and gifted with the power to hear the voices of the departed, B. Thankful is cast aside by the town, and lives an isolated upbringing in the woods with Big G, Little G, and Tyler Lucknow.paperback & ebook
Tragedy, followed by the discovery of along-forgotten paint-by-number picture of the Last Supper, thrusts B. Thankful from the safety of everything she has ever known.
Beyond the boundary of her sheltered life, B. Thankful discovers the world's hard edges as well as its beauty. More importantly, with the help of a cast of quirky and tenderhearted souls (both earthly and heavenly), she discovers why God made her special.
Published: July 2012
Goodreads, Amazon, Barnes & Noble, IndieBound, Smashwords
Excerpt:
THE LAST SUPPER
CATERING COMPANY
_______________
Michaelene McElroy
ONE
My momma died on a hot August afternoon in 1950, right before I was born. My grandma, Little G, was out picking blackberries for pie making, and my momma-to-be was out hanging sheets on the line, when Little G heard a scream from across the yard. She looked up from her bucket of berries just in time to watch Momma begin a lazy fall, as if overcome by some long held tiredness. The wooden clothespins flew from Momma’s hands, snapping at the air on the way down, looking for something to hold onto. Momma was dead by the time she hit the ground, her head resting on the damp pillowcase in her hand, her why questioning eyes looking up to God.
Little G said I could probably see daylight when Momma squatted down–that’s how close to being born I was. So, despite her motherly anguish at the sight of her dead daughter lying in the tinder dry grass, Little G reached into her baby girl’s womb and pulled me into this life. Little G swore she heard a thousand voices follow me into the world, but not a single one was able to comfort her that day.
I listened to Little G tell of that day so many times her words became the marrow of my bones. And I always took delight when she turned boldly dramatic in acting out the part where she held me upside down and slapped my behind again and again, not because she was angry with me, but because she needed me to live.
“Be thankful for life! Be thankful for life!” she called out then and with every retelling.
When I let out my first baby cry, Little G cut the cord connecting me to Momma’s tragedy, wrapped me in a pillowcase, and clutched me to her old woman breasts. What with life coming and going in the same moment, Little G’s tears were no doubt confused as to why they were called upon.
Poor Little G had no time to consider the why of it all, for the sun was so white hot it made the air too lazy to move, and my dead momma was beginning to sunburn. For the life of me, I could not imagine Little G holding me in one arm as she dragged her broken daughter into the shade of the old red oak. To add to her troubles, I was longing loud for a breast to suckle. Like those old clothespins, I, too, was looking for something to hold onto.
Though it might sound a bit more than strange to some, I believe every mother will understand why Little G did what she did next. Sitting with her back against the old red oak, she took her daughter into her arms, Momma’s head resting childlike in the crook of Little G’s elbow. One-by-one, she unbuttoned her baby girl’s pink rosebud blouse, pulled back Momma’s brassiere, and laid me to her milk filled breasts.
“Pretty Childe, this is your daughter, B. Thankful Childe. B. Thankful, this is your momma, Pretty Childe.”
There she stayed, rocking her baby girl and me until the sun set and Tyler Lucknow came calling, as he did most every night to make sure everything was right and in its place.
According to Little G, Momma walked with an empty spot on her right shoulder where her guardian angel should have been. Without a guardian angel to protect her, and blind to the love of the one who truly cared for her, Pretty Childe fell into the arms of every junkyard dog of a man. When the dark water washed away what goodness lay deep within Momma and sent her lost soul wandering, looking for some kind of hurtful love for the night, Tyler would come along and find her banged up body outside some booze joint. Setting the threats to his own life aside, he’d take her home, where Little G cleaned her up and put her daughter to bed. Shotgun in hand, and Tyler by her side, Little G would stand watch on the porch until the morning light rose over the hills, and the threat of no-account cowards who slithered in the night, passed.
After I heard Little G tell that story, I was certain Momma did have a guardian angel watching out for her. And that angel’s name was Tyler Lucknow.
The day after Momma died, Tyler dug her grave out in the back forty where all who had gone before were waiting. No one but baby me, Little G, Big G (my great grandma), and Tyler were there to say goodbye.
My Little G’s refusal to see the world in black or white, preferring to embrace all the colors God created, set tongues to waggin’ when she placed Tyler Lucknow’s name on my birth certificate in the box where a daddy’s name would show up proud. It was such a nice thing for him to allow, trying to save me from being looked upon as a bastard. But to town folk, having Tyler Lucknow’s name on my birth certificate made being born a bastard appear saint-like.
Years later, but still with nothing better to do, those graceless folks made sure their hurtful stories traveled all the way down our road. One day, Little G found me down by the river, my tears bubbling up and over onto the latest spiteful notes I found nailed to our mail box post. Little G took my face into her calloused hands, wiped away my tears, and brushed back my unruly hair.
“B. Thankful, you are a blessing from God that just happened to ride in on a cursed highway. Those fools are just jealous because God brought you into this world to do Him a big favor one day.”
Whenever I tugged on Little G’s patience with my questions around what that favor might be, she would name a chore to be done and send me on my way. While I waited for God to call upon me and ask His favor, I lived an isolated childhood in the woods between Beauty and the land of Majestic with three of His finest.
______________________
_______________
Michaelene McElroy
ONE
My momma died on a hot August afternoon in 1950, right before I was born. My grandma, Little G, was out picking blackberries for pie making, and my momma-to-be was out hanging sheets on the line, when Little G heard a scream from across the yard. She looked up from her bucket of berries just in time to watch Momma begin a lazy fall, as if overcome by some long held tiredness. The wooden clothespins flew from Momma’s hands, snapping at the air on the way down, looking for something to hold onto. Momma was dead by the time she hit the ground, her head resting on the damp pillowcase in her hand, her why questioning eyes looking up to God.
Little G said I could probably see daylight when Momma squatted down–that’s how close to being born I was. So, despite her motherly anguish at the sight of her dead daughter lying in the tinder dry grass, Little G reached into her baby girl’s womb and pulled me into this life. Little G swore she heard a thousand voices follow me into the world, but not a single one was able to comfort her that day.
I listened to Little G tell of that day so many times her words became the marrow of my bones. And I always took delight when she turned boldly dramatic in acting out the part where she held me upside down and slapped my behind again and again, not because she was angry with me, but because she needed me to live.
“Be thankful for life! Be thankful for life!” she called out then and with every retelling.
When I let out my first baby cry, Little G cut the cord connecting me to Momma’s tragedy, wrapped me in a pillowcase, and clutched me to her old woman breasts. What with life coming and going in the same moment, Little G’s tears were no doubt confused as to why they were called upon.
Poor Little G had no time to consider the why of it all, for the sun was so white hot it made the air too lazy to move, and my dead momma was beginning to sunburn. For the life of me, I could not imagine Little G holding me in one arm as she dragged her broken daughter into the shade of the old red oak. To add to her troubles, I was longing loud for a breast to suckle. Like those old clothespins, I, too, was looking for something to hold onto.
Though it might sound a bit more than strange to some, I believe every mother will understand why Little G did what she did next. Sitting with her back against the old red oak, she took her daughter into her arms, Momma’s head resting childlike in the crook of Little G’s elbow. One-by-one, she unbuttoned her baby girl’s pink rosebud blouse, pulled back Momma’s brassiere, and laid me to her milk filled breasts.
“Pretty Childe, this is your daughter, B. Thankful Childe. B. Thankful, this is your momma, Pretty Childe.”
There she stayed, rocking her baby girl and me until the sun set and Tyler Lucknow came calling, as he did most every night to make sure everything was right and in its place.
According to Little G, Momma walked with an empty spot on her right shoulder where her guardian angel should have been. Without a guardian angel to protect her, and blind to the love of the one who truly cared for her, Pretty Childe fell into the arms of every junkyard dog of a man. When the dark water washed away what goodness lay deep within Momma and sent her lost soul wandering, looking for some kind of hurtful love for the night, Tyler would come along and find her banged up body outside some booze joint. Setting the threats to his own life aside, he’d take her home, where Little G cleaned her up and put her daughter to bed. Shotgun in hand, and Tyler by her side, Little G would stand watch on the porch until the morning light rose over the hills, and the threat of no-account cowards who slithered in the night, passed.
After I heard Little G tell that story, I was certain Momma did have a guardian angel watching out for her. And that angel’s name was Tyler Lucknow.
The day after Momma died, Tyler dug her grave out in the back forty where all who had gone before were waiting. No one but baby me, Little G, Big G (my great grandma), and Tyler were there to say goodbye.
My Little G’s refusal to see the world in black or white, preferring to embrace all the colors God created, set tongues to waggin’ when she placed Tyler Lucknow’s name on my birth certificate in the box where a daddy’s name would show up proud. It was such a nice thing for him to allow, trying to save me from being looked upon as a bastard. But to town folk, having Tyler Lucknow’s name on my birth certificate made being born a bastard appear saint-like.
Years later, but still with nothing better to do, those graceless folks made sure their hurtful stories traveled all the way down our road. One day, Little G found me down by the river, my tears bubbling up and over onto the latest spiteful notes I found nailed to our mail box post. Little G took my face into her calloused hands, wiped away my tears, and brushed back my unruly hair.
“B. Thankful, you are a blessing from God that just happened to ride in on a cursed highway. Those fools are just jealous because God brought you into this world to do Him a big favor one day.”
Whenever I tugged on Little G’s patience with my questions around what that favor might be, she would name a chore to be done and send me on my way. While I waited for God to call upon me and ask His favor, I lived an isolated childhood in the woods between Beauty and the land of Majestic with three of His finest.
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About the Author:
Michaelene McElroy makes her debut as an author with The Last Supper Catering Company. She lives in the woods on an island in the Puget Sound where magic is ever present.
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